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The darkness has not hurt me by what it has actually done.  The darkness has hurt me by making what it has done into something untellable.

I know the darkness must know this.

The darkness knows our weaknesses, our desires, our hopes and dreams.

How much does the darkness know?

Will I survive?

And if I don’t survive, where will I go?  Will I see light?

My heart breaks and breaks again too many times.

I wonder about Karma.  I wonder about some cosmic beast that has had it in for me from the time I was made.  And when was I made?  Have I lived here before?  Do I just not know?  Who have I been in life?

The more I seek light the more darkness comes to take me away.

The darkness rapes me.

I see glimpses of light, like through windows.  It is always into somebody else’s home.

It seems to know I cannot break free.

I am not let in.

Where am I tethered?  Sucking the contents out of my umbilicus.  Stealing into my children’s lives where I grow them.

Nobody should touch me.  Modern day leper.


Please save me.

Please make this story yours.